You Will Refer Bible To Believe This – Quotes and Thoughts (2023)



The Bible and Bible verses are always and usually considered as boring thing (at least for those who don’t believe in God) stuffed with full of commandments about what you shouldn’t do and what you should do. But, have you ever read a particular Bible verse and found yourself laughing or amused?

While it’s important to pray, honor and meditate on the Word of God…… it can be always hard not to laugh or at least giggle at some of the unexpected lessons we are taught throughout The Bible. There can be times when we get a different conception about some Bible verses, which is why it seems to be funny and bizarre. Let’s admit it; some bible verses are so funny that when we read them , I have to stop and laugh as I found them too funny and hilarious.


In fact, there are some unusual bible verses that can be sexually explicit and, sometimes, even contradict the Ten Commandments.

However, if you study these so called ‘funny bible verses’ carefully and in detail, their exact meaning are very useful. Here are the funniest bible verses that you should know.


“And there was a young man named Eutychus sitting on the window sill, sinking into a deep sleep; and as Paul kept on talking, he was overcome by sleep and fell down from the third floor and was picked up dead.” – Acts 20:9-10

“Would that those who are upsetting you might also castrate themselves!” Galatians 5:12


“From there Elisha went up to Bethel. As he was walking along the road, some boys came out of the town and jeered at him. “Get out of here, baldy!” they said. “Get out of here, baldy!” He turned around, looked at them and called down a curse on them in the name of the Lord. Then two bears came out of the woods and mauled forty-two of the boys.” 2 Kings 2:23-24

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“Then the LORD commanded the fish, and it vomited Jonah up onto the dry land.” – Jonah 2:10

“Your teeth are like a flock of newly shorn ewes, which have come up from their washing, all of which bear twins, and not one among them has lost her young.” – Song of Solomon 4:2


“A feast is made for laughter, wine makes life merry, and money is the answer for everything.” – Ecclesiastes 10:19

“He said to Jacob, “Let me gulp down some of that red stuff; I’m starving.” – Genesis 25:30

“These people are not drunk, as you suppose, for it is only nine o’clock in the morning.” – Acts 2:15

“Refresh me with apples, sustain me with raisin cakes, For I am lovesick.” – Songs 2:4


“Better to live on a corner of the roof than share a house with a quarrelsome wife.” – Proverbs 21:9

“Worst of all wounds is that of the heart, worst of all evils is that of a woman.” – Sirach 25:12

“It is better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and an angry woman.” – Proverbs 21:19

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“Like a gold ring in a pig’s snout is a beautiful woman who shows no discretion.” – Proverbs 11:22

“A continual dropping in a very rainy day and a contentious woman are alike.” Proverbs 27:15


“Very well,” he replied, “I allow you cow’s dung in place of human excrement; bake your bread on that.” – Ezekiel 4:12-15

“Happy is the one who seizes your infants and dashes them against the rocks.” – Psalms 137:9


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“When men strive together one with another, and the wife of the one draweth near for to deliver her husband out of the hand of him that smiteth him, and putteth forth her hand, and taketh him by the secrets: 12 Then thou shalt cut off her hand, thine eye shall not pity her.” – Deuteronomy 25:11


“For in much wisdom is much grief: and he that increaseth knowledge increaseth sorrow.” – Ecclesiastes 1:18

“You also took the fine jewelry I gave you, the jewelry made of my gold and silver, and you made for yourself male idols and engaged in prostitution with them.” – Ezekiel 16:17

“No one whose testicles have been crushed or whose penis has been cut off may be admitted into the community of the LORD.” – Deuteronomy 23:2

“Yet she increased her prostitution, remembering the days of her youth when she engaged in prostitution in the land of Egypt. She lusted after their genitals – as large as those of donkeys, and their seminal emission was as strong as that of stallions.” – 1. Ezekiel 23:19

“Now it came about after these things, that it was told Abraham, saying, ‘Behold, Milcah also has borne children to your brother Nahor: Uzhis firstborn andBuzhis brother.” – Genesis 22:20-21

“And Miriam and Aaron spake against Moses because of the Ethiopian whom he had married: for he had married an Ethiopian woman.” – Numbers 12:1

“Whosoever hideth her hideth the wind, and the ointment of his right hand, which bewrayeth itself.” – Proverbs 27:15-16

“Yet she became more and more promiscuous as she recalled the days of her youth, when she was a prostitute in Egypt. There she lusted after her lovers, whose genitals were like those of donkeys and whose emission was like that of horses.” – Ezekiel 23:19-20

“As Paul spoke on and on, a young man named Eutychus, sitting on the windowsill, became very drowsy. Finally, he fell sound asleep and dropped three stories to his death below.” – Acts 20:9

Remark Dear preachers, please take this as a warning. Your parishioners will fall asleep and die if youlet your sermons go “on and on and on”


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“Give strong drink unto him that is ready to perish, and wine unto those that be of heavy hearts” – Proverbs 31:6

“Where Jesus is so angry at a fig tree being out of season, he curses it to death.” – Mathew 21

“18 Early in the morning, as Jesus was on his way back to the city, he was hungry. 19 Seeing a fig tree by the road, he went up to it but found nothing on it except leaves. Then he said to it, “May you never bear fruit again!” Immediately the tree withered. 20 When the disciples saw this, they were amazed. “How did the fig tree wither so quickly?” they asked. 21 Jesus replied, “Truly I tell you, if you have faith and do not doubt, not only can you do what was done to the fig tree, but also you can say to this mountain, ‘Go, throw yourself into the sea,’ and it will be done. 22 If you believe, you will receive whatever you ask for in prayer.” – Matthew 21:18-22

RemarkWe have a doubt here. Why didn’t he just make it bear fruit? Instead of killing the fig tree…. Ultimately, everyone should win! Right?

“11 If two men fight together, and the wife of one draws near to rescue her husband from the hand of the one attacking him, and puts out her hand and seizes him by the genitals, 12 you shall cut off her hand. Show her no pity.” – Deuteronomy 25:11-12


“Then he said to me, “See, I assign to you cow’s dung instead of human dung, on which you may prepare your bread.” – Ezekiel 4:15

“And you shall eat it as a barley cake, baking it in their sight on human dung.” –Ezekiel 4:12

“But the Rabshakeh said, “Has my master sent me to speak these words to your master and to you, and not to the men sitting on the wall, who are doomed with you to eat their own dung and drink their own urine?” –Isaiah 36:12

“You shall have a place outside the camp, and you shall go out to it. And you shall have a trowel with your tools, and when you sit down outside, you shall dig a hole with it and turn back and cover up your excrement.” –Deuteronomy 23:12-13


“And Ehud reached with his left hand, took the sword from his right thigh, and thrust it into his belly. And the hilt also went in after the blade, and the fat closed over the blade, for he did not pull the sword out of his belly; and the dung came out.” –Judges 3:21-22

“I will bring distress on mankind, so that they shall walk like the blind, because they have sinned against the Lord; their blood shall be poured out like dust, and their flesh like dung.” –Zephaniah 1:17

“And there was a great famine in Samaria, as they besieged it, until a donkey’s head was sold for eighty shekels of silver, and the fourth part of a kab of dove’s dung for five shekels of silver.” –2 Kings 6:25

“Speak, Thus declares the Lord: ‘The dead bodies of men shall fall like dung upon the open field, like sheaves after the reaper, and none shall gather them.’”– Jeremiah 9:22

“And you shall have a trowel with your tools, and when you sit down outside, you shall dig a hole with it and turn back and cover up your excrement. Because the Lord your God walks in the midst of your camp, to deliver you and to give up your enemies before you, therefore your camp must be holy, so that he may not see anything indecent among you and turn away from you.” – Deuteronomy 23:13-14


“When two men are fighting and the wife of one of them intervenes to drag her husband clear of his opponent, if she puts out her hand and catches hold of the man by his privates, you must cut off her hand and show her no mercy.”Deut. 25:11

“Look, I have two daughters, virgins both of them. Let me bring them out to you and you could do what you like with them. But do nothing to these men because they have come under the shelter of my roof.” – 11. Genesis 19:8

“Then because of the dire straits to which you will be reduced when your enemy besieges you, you will eat your own children, the flesh of your sons and daughters whom the Lord has given you.” – 10. Deut. 28:53

“A young man was following Him, wearing nothing but a linen sheet over his naked body; and they seized him. But he pulled free of the linen sheet and escaped naked.” – 8. Mark 14:51

“Onan knew that the offspring would not be his; so when he went in to his brother’s wife, he wasted his seed on the ground in order not to give offspring to his brother. But what he did was displeasing in the sight of the LORD; so He took his life also.” – 7. Genesis 38:9

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“[There is] nothing better for a man, [than] that he should eat and drink, and [that] he should make his soul enjoy good in his labour. This also I saw, that it [was] from the hand of God.” – Ecclesiastes 2:24

“And also that every man should eat and drink, and enjoy the good of all his labour, it [is] the gift of God.” – Ecclesiastes 3:13

“A merry heart maketh a cheerful countenance: but by sorrow of the heart the spirit is broken.” – Proverbs 15:13

“Then I commended mirth, because a man hath no better thing under the sun, than to eat, and to drink, and to be merry: for that shall abide with him of his labour the days of his life, which God giveth him under the sun.” – Ecclesiastes 8:15

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“Rejoice, O young man, in thy youth; and let thy heart cheer thee in the days of thy youth, and walk in the ways of thine heart, and in the sight of thine eyes: but know thou, that for all these [things] God will bring thee into judgment.” – Ecclesiastes 11:9

“Whether therefore ye eat, or drink, or whatsoever ye do, do all to the glory of God.” – 1 Corinthians 10:31

“And there ye shall eat before the LORD your God, and ye shall rejoice in all that ye put your hand unto, ye and your households, wherein the LORD thy God hath blessed thee.” – Deuteronomy 12:7

“Let them praise his name in the dance: let them sing praises unto him with the timbrel and harp.” – Psalms 149:3


“And bring hither the fatted calf, and kill [it]; and let us eat, and be merry:” – Luke 15:23-24

“A merry heart doeth good [like] a medicine: but a broken spirit drieth the bones.” – Proverbs 17:22

“And as the ark of the LORD came into the city of David, Michal Saul’s daughter looked through a window, and saw king David leaping and dancing before the LORD; and she despised him in her heart”. – 2 Samuel 6:16

“Drink no longer water, but use a little wine for thy stomach’s sake and thine often infirmities.” – 1 Timothy 5:23

“And the streets of the city shall be full of boys and girls playing in the streets thereof.” – Zechariah 8:5

“And they rose up early on the morrow, and offered burnt offerings, and brought peace offerings; and the people sat down to eat and to drink, and rose up to play.” – Exodus 32:6


“See what large letters I use as I write to you with my own hand!” – Galatians 6:11

“He who blesses his friend with a loud voice early in the morning, it will be reckoned a curse to him.” – Proverbs 27:14

“At Parbar westward, four at the causeway, and two at Parbar.” – 1 Chronicles 26:18

“When he opened the seventh seal, there was silence in heaven for about half an hour” – Revelations 8:1

“As a dog returns to its vomit, so a fool repeats his folly.” – Proverbs 26:11

“Do not eat anything you find already dead. You may give it to an alien living in any of your towns and he may eat it, or you may sell it to a foreigner…” – Deuteronomy 14:21

“From there Elisha went up to Bethel. As he was walking along the road some youths came out of the town and jeered at him. “Go on up, you baldhead!” they said. “Go on up, you baldhead!” He turned around, and looked at them and called down a curse on them in the name of the Lord. Then two bears came out of the woods and mauled forty-two of the youths.” – 2 Kings 2:23-24

“The lookout reported, “He has reached them, but he isn’t coming back either. The driving is like that of Jehu son of Nimshi–he drives like a madman.”– 2 Kings 9:20


“Let those among you who are without sin be the first to throw the stone. The crowd looked at Jesus, believing he had a good point. Then Jesus picked up a stone” – Unknown

“Let there be sound. There was sound. Let there be light. There was light. Let there be drums. There was drums. Let there be guitar. There was guitar. Oh, Let there be rock.” – Unknown

“God said unto John, “Come forth and recieve eternal life.

But John came fifth and won a toaster.” – Unknown

“In the beginning, there was nothing. And then god created light, because he was afraid of the dark.” – Unknown

“And thou shall keep this last commandment close, that thou shalt not create more bible verse.” – Unknown

“Eat this cracker, for it is my body. Drink this wine, for it is my blood. Eat this cheeto, for it is spray painted styrofoam” – Unknown


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You Will Refer Bible To Believe This – Quotes and Thoughts? ›

For to set the mind on the flesh is death, but to set the mind on the Spirit is life and peace.” “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.”

What does the Bible say about thinking and thoughts? ›

For to set the mind on the flesh is death, but to set the mind on the Spirit is life and peace.” “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.”

Where in the Bible does it say your thoughts are not my thoughts? ›

For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the LORD. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts.

What is the meaning of Romans 12 2? ›

Romans 12:2 shows that we live out God's will when we change our thoughts to God's thoughts, rather than living like the world dictates. The world will always pressure us to live sinfully and selfishly, but to live the good life God wants from us requires changing how we behave—by changing our thoughts.

What does the Bible say about God thoughts? ›

For I know the thoughts I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.” Jeremiah 29:11. “Your eyes saw my substance, being yet unformed. And in Your book they all were written, the days fashioned for me, when as yet there were none of them.

What does the Bible say about thoughts and actions? ›

Proverbs 4:23 In-Context

23 Be careful what you think, because your thoughts run your life. 24 Don't use your mouth to tell lies; don't ever say things that are not true. 25 Keep your eyes focused on what is right, and look straight ahead to what is good.

Does God speak to us through our thoughts? ›

He also speaks to us through the glory of His creation. Additionally, He speaks to us through His Holy Spirit and through dreams, visions and our thoughts. Further, God will use events and circumstances to speak with us. More often than not, God uses the people He has placed in our lives to speak to us.

Can God read our minds and thoughts? ›

In Psalm 94 we read: “The Lord knows the thoughts of man” ( Psalm 94:11 ). And another psalm tells us “He [God] knows what is concealed in the heart” ( Psalm 44:22 ). The notion that the biblical God not only sees our bodies but also knows our thoughts is one with which most scholars today would automatically agree.

Where in the Bible does it say I know the thoughts I think toward you? ›

For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the LORD, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon Me and go and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. And you will seek Me and find Me, when you search for Me with all your heart.

Does God listen to my thoughts? ›

The simple answer is yes, God hears your prayers. An ever-present, all-knowing God will hear every word from your mouth, thought in your mind and whisper of your heart. But there are some things that might affect whether He answers. Now, let us get one thing straight before we go on… God loves you.

What does Romans 12 teaches us? ›

Keep in mind the rich mercy of God to you – past, present, and future (by the mercies of God). As an act of intelligent worship, decide to yield your entire self to Him (present your bodies a living sacrifice). Resist conformity to the thoughts and actions of this world (do not be conformed).

What is Isaiah 41 verse 10? ›

10 So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

What is the meaning of Romans 12 9? ›

Here in 12:9, Paul assumes that his audience knows that they are to love; he exhorts them to make their love for each other genuine. Paul begins this section of 12:9-13 with the exhortation to “let love be genuine” (verse 9), and then shows what this love looks like.

What does the Bible say about pure thoughts? ›

Proverbs 15:26 - The Lord detests the thoughts of the wicked, but those of the pure are pleasing to him. Pray: Dear Lord, I want to please You with my thoughts, not just my actions. I surrender my mind to You today. In Jesus' name, Amen.

What are the three things God wants us to do? ›

We are people who should do justice, love kindness, and walk humbly before God.

How does God feel about our thoughts? ›

Our Thoughts Matter to God

And because He is perfect and flawless, we, as imperfect beings, full of flaws, can take refuge in Him especially in thoughts, that is through prayer. He knows everything and every detail of our thoughts and He listens to them.

What does Jesus say about thinking? ›

Change your mind” is the central theme of Jesus' first sermon (Matt. 4:17). Jesus challenged people to change their thinking because regardless how many times you read through the Bible, if your mind doesn't change, you will simply impose your biases and labels on the words you read.

What Scripture says about things to think on? ›

Philippians 4:8 King James Version (KJV) Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.


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